Okay. Interesting territory. We all know lying is bad news. You shouldn't do it. You shouldn't associate with those that do. Kindergarten 101. That and sharing, but I don't feel like sharing this post with "sharing," so simply lying it shall be...
Which, we ALL do. Everyday. And that's not necessarily a bad thing. This whole topic got started from a Lifetime TV movie that A and M were watching the other night...that ripped a good ten minutes of my life away when I happened to pass through the living room during that fateful time slot.
The movie was - of all things - about an author who ghostwrites other people's books, and a yuppie doctor. Both vying for the heart of the central female lead. Riveting...and ground-breaking. So fresh!
I peeled myself away from the chair and went - I think I merrily skipped - back upstairs to Legoland thinking that was that. But, that was not that. Ugh...
The next day on the way to church, this same movie reared its ugly head in the car. This other lady character had the nerve to LIE about writing those romance novels when it was really "what's-his-face" writer dude the female lead liked. This other lady was taking all the credit and "lying" to the world. Um...
I was literally having to say don't base life decisions on a Lifetime movie. The way the whole "story" was set up was bogus and unrealistic to begin with. And ghostwriting is a respectable job. Has nothing to do with lying. Yet, A and M saw it as portraying such and I was dragged kicking and screaming into a word match with them about lying.
In A's defense, teaching kiddos about the intricacies of falsehood is not a path to be taken lightly. In the wrong hands, stretching the truth can be catastrophic.
(UPDATE: After a talk today, A no longer sees ghostwriting as a lie. She sees it as a job people do to help the "author" get their story on paper.)
My argument was - and still is - that sometimes it's okay to lie. Shocker! But wait...there's more!
Lying for the sake of lying, or worse, for the intent to harm someone, is horrible. Lying for a malicious intent has no place in decent society. Bad guys and supervillians do that kinda stuff. Boo. Hiss. However...
Lying to feel good in one's own skin (ie. makeup, hair color, extensions, spray tans, yada, yada...) is fine. Lying to save someone's life (ie. hello, the people who hid Anne Frank!) is perfectly acceptable. And commendable. And then ya got guys who buy engagement rings and have to lie about going to pick them up, excellent ghost-written books by ficticious Lifetime movie actors, Santa Claus...
The trick is, to call a lie a lie. There's either truth, or there's not. Grey is for hair and trendy wall coloring. Not for when it comes to what is, and what isn't. The lie's ultimate goodness relies ultimately upon its intent. Just be upfront and honest with yourself about the fact that you're lying.
Trying to spin word magic and rationalize a lie into a tasty ice cream sundae is ridiculous, and messy.
